This column is just for fun. My son and his wife live and teach in Shanghai, China. Their oldest, Chloe, will be four in July and has some imaginative musings on life. Many of her observations involve her younger brother Paul, also called DiDi, which is Chinese for little brother. Dave has given me permission to share these quotes. Enjoy!
8-10-12 “Why Is It Raining?”
We’re on a walk. It starts to rain.
Chloe: “Why is it raining, daddy?”
Me: “Because God wanted it to rain. He providentially directed the weather patterns to bring about rain. See, natural processes are just an expression of God’s providence.”
Chloe: (after a long, thoughtful pause) “… Sombrero! I like to say ‘sombrero!'”
9-28-12 “Is It Something in Your Nose?”
The following is a real unprompted conversation.
Me (seeing my son with a veritable river flowing from his nose): Agh! DiDi! Don’t move! You have a huge snot!
Chloe: Daddy, what’s a snot? Is it something in your nose? I have some snots in my nose, too. They’re just resting … Shh! My snots in my nose are sleeping, so be quiet! … (stroking her nose) … rest safe and snug, little snots.
10-2-12 Fragrant and Lovely
Me changing my son’s diaper: Yuck, DiDi! Why are you so stinky and disgusting? Why can’t you be fragrant and lovely?
Chloe, from across the room, and without looking up from her Curious George tome: Well, Daddy, I’m fragrant and lovely sometimes. So … it’s OK.
10-24-12 Submarines and Treasure
Chloe (reading a book about vehicles in air, land, and sea): Daddy, I think they use submarines to take sick people to the hospital.
Me: Eh … not usually. They usually use them to find things in the ocean, because it’s really hard to see in the deep water.
Chloe: Actually, we can just wear goggles.
Me: For shallow water, sure. But for a lot of water, you might need a submarine.
… she thinks about this for a while …
Chloe: If we drop a ball in the water, we should use a submarine to get it.
Chloe: Like maybe a really big ball.
Me: Well, say, like gold. Something *really* important.
Chloe: Like … like chocolate?
Me: Er … maybe like gold. A lot of gold.
Chloe: No, like a VERY, VERY BIG BOX of chocolate.
11-28-12 Computers Have Mothers
Kitchen computer refuses to boot. I’ve had it disassembled for a couple of days, and have answered Chloe’s questions about it as well as I can.
She comes into the room and sees parts strewn about.
Chloe: What are you doing, Daddy?
Me: Fixing the computer.
Chloe: What is that thing? [points to a screw]
Me: That’s a screw. It holds the computer together.
Chloe: Does it need its mommy?
Me: Screws don’t really have mommies, exactly.
Chloe: Yes, it does. You told me. It has a computer mommy.
Me: Did I say that?
Chloe: Yes, you told me. The computer mommy inside the computer.
Me: ::looking quizzical::
Chloe: … the … um … uh … you told me the computer has a mommy board!