Quotes from Chloe, Part Deux

Back by popular demand here are further quotes from my four-year-old granddaughter.   My son and his wife live and teach in Shanghai, China.  Chloe was four in July and has some imaginative musings on life.  Many of her observations involve her younger brother Paul, also called DiDi, which is Chinese for little brother.  Our son Dave originally wrote down these quotes and has once again given me permission to share them. Enjoy!

I’m Going to Marry….

11-30-12

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I’m playing a Batman game, creeping through the darkness to take down baddies. Chloe’s watching over my shoulder.

Chloe: We need to get a girl for him.

Me: Who?

Chloe: We need to get a girl for Batman, so he can get married.

Me: Oh, really? I think there are some girls who want to marry him, but he’s busy.

Chloe: *I* want to marry Uncle Paul (a co-worker and fellow teacher in Shanghai)

Me: Why is that?

Chloe: Because I will grow up soon, and I want to be a bride.

Me: But why Uncle Paul?

Chloe: Because … well, I *do* like him.

Me: Maybe you could marry Batman.

Chloe: Oh! Oh, yes! I’ll marry Batman.

Me: Why do you like Batman?

Chloe: Because he’s so powerful. He saves the day. He saved the day for my whole life!

Me: Who do you want to marry, then? Batman or Uncle Paul?

Chloe: Batman.

Thugs

12-21-12

Chloe: Here, Daddy. Eat this banana [handing me a plastic banana].

::I pretend to nibble at it.::

Chloe: You’re so cute, Daddy. You’re just like a little baby thug.

Me [choking on my banana]: I’m a what?

Chloe: You’re a little thug. What does thug mean, Daddy?

Me: It’s a bad person who hurts people. Where did you hear that word?

Chloe: But you’re a nice thug. You’re a nice little fluffy baggy thug.

The Muffin

1-10-13

Chloe’s eating a blueberry muffin while I do correspondence.

Chloe: [holding up a blueberry] This one is brave.

Me: The which what now?

Chloe: [holding up a morsel of muffin] And this one is the bad guy. [she hurls it back into the bowl containing the brave blueberry and the rest of the muffin] They’re fighting. [makes fighting noises]

Me: Your muffin components are fighting each other?

Chloe: [snatches both up and stuffs them in her mouth] Uh-oh … someone ate the fighters. Too bad.

DiDi Is a …….

1-26-13

Chloe and DiDi are eating macaroni and cheese for lunch. Chloe climbs down from her chair and comes over to me, looking serious.

Chloe: I want to talk to you, Daddy.

Me: OK. What do you want to talk about?   Livingroom 1

Chloe: DiDi. DiDi is a filthy pig.

Potty Training

2-12-13

We’re potty training DiDi right now. This can make for some tense moments, as it did yesterday. I’m in my room working.

Chloe [calling from her room]: Look, Daddy! POO!

Me [dashing in]: What? Where’s the poo?!

Chloe [pointing to book]: Right here! He’s giving some honey to Piglet!

Phew! Just a false alarm … THIS time …

Dinosaurs

2-22-13

Yesterday a package arrived from Grandma and Grandpa bearing, among other things, a couple of highly detailed dinosaur action figures. Last night, as we’re getting ready for bed, I come into the room to find Chloe kneeling on the rug, staring intently at the two dinosaurs, which she’s placed side-by-side in front of her. She’s not doing anything — just staring at them.

Me: What are you doing, baby?

Chloe [very quietly]: I’m watching this dinosaur to see if it’s real or just a toy. I’m watching him to see if he winks at me or not. If he winks at me, he’s a real dinosaur. And I will give him some dinner.

Thank You

3-11-13

Me: OK, Chloe, here’s your cookie. Why don’t you share it with DiDi?

Chloe: [breaking the cookie in half] Here you go, DiDi!

DiDi: Tank oo.

Chloe: I forgive you, DiDi!

Me: [choking back laughter] No, baby — when someone says ‘thank you,’ we should say ‘you’re welcome’.

Chloe: I’m welcome, DiDi!

Me: Suanle ba …

Facts about Bison I Bet You Didn’t Know

3-16-13

Every morning we review the Apostle’s Creed and learn about an animal. Today’s animal was the bison (Aunt Annie suggested that maybe we were skewing a little too heavy on the carnivores, so we’re branching out). When Des came back from her prayer time, I decided we should review.

Me: What animal did we learn about, Chloe?

Chloe: Bison!

Me: Can you tell Mommy something about bison?

Chloe: They’re … they’re very small [indicating with her fingers a bison about the size of a penny].

Me: No, silly! How big are they really?

Chloe: AS BIG AS A WHOLE HUGE HOUSE!

Me: Come on, Chloe! Why don’t you tell Mama what we learned?

Chloe: But Daddy, I’d rather just make something up!

::sob::

Quotes from Chloe

2012-09-022This column is just for fun. My son and his wife live and teach in Shanghai, China.  Their oldest, Chloe, will be four in July and has some imaginative musings on life.  Many of her observations involve her younger brother Paul, also called DiDi, which is Chinese for little brother.  Dave has given me permission to share these quotes. Enjoy!

 

8-10-12 “Why Is It Raining?”

We’re on a walk. It starts to rain.

Chloe: “Why is it raining, daddy?”

Me: “Because God wanted it to rain. He providentially directed the weather patterns to bring about rain. See, natural processes are just an expression of God’s providence.”

Chloe: (after a long, thoughtful pause) “… Sombrero! I like to say ‘sombrero!'”

 

9-28-12 “Is It Something in Your Nose?”

The following is a real unprompted conversation.

Me (seeing my son with a veritable river flowing from his nose): Agh! DiDi! Don’t move! You have a huge snot!

Chloe: Daddy, what’s a snot? Is it something in your nose? I have some snots in my nose, too. They’re just resting … Shh! My snots in my nose are sleeping, so be quiet! … (stroking her nose) … rest safe and snug, little snots.

 

 

10-2-12 Fragrant and Lovely

Me changing my son’s diaper: Yuck, DiDi! Why are you so stinky and disgusting? Why can’t you be fragrant and lovely?

Chloe, from across the room, and without looking up from her Curious George tome: Well, Daddy, I’m fragrant and lovely sometimes. So … it’s OK.

 

 

10-24-12 Submarines and Treasure

Chloe (reading a book about vehicles in air, land, and sea): Daddy, I think they use submarines to take sick people to the hospital.

Me: Eh … not usually. They usually use them to find things in the ocean, because it’s really hard to see in the deep water.

Chloe: Actually, we can just wear goggles.

Me: For shallow water, sure. But for a lot of water, you might need a submarine.

… she thinks about this for a while …

Chloe: If we drop a ball in the water, we should use a submarine to get it.

Me: That might not be cost-effective. People usually use it for really important stuff, like treasures.   Chloe 1

Chloe: Like maybe a really big ball.

Me: Well, say, like gold. Something *really* important.

Chloe: Like … like chocolate?

Me: Er … maybe like gold. A lot of gold.

Chloe: No, like a VERY, VERY BIG BOX of chocolate.

 

 

11-28-12 Computers Have Mothers

Kitchen computer refuses to boot. I’ve had it disassembled for a couple of days, and have answered Chloe’s questions about it as well as I can.

She comes into the room and sees parts strewn about.

Chloe: What are you doing, Daddy?

Me: Fixing the computer.

Chloe: What is that thing? [points to a screw]

Me: That’s a screw. It holds the computer together.

Chloe: Does it need its mommy?

Me: Screws don’t really have mommies, exactly.

Chloe: Yes, it does. You told me. It has a computer mommy.

Me: Did I say that?

Chloe: Yes, you told me. The computer mommy inside the computer.

Me: ::looking quizzical::

Chloe: … the … um … uh … you told me the computer has a mommy board!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Blind Thoughts

Blind Thoughts

This is the third in the trilogy of posts on “blind things.”

What an Imagination!

I love the Anne of Green Gables books.  Anne (with an e) Shirley was constantly inspired to discover things that provided ‘scope for the imagination.’  And what an imagination she had!  Sometimes her imagination comforted her, sometimes it motivated her, but sometimes it got her into big trouble.

The problem with having a good imagination is that you can let your thoughts blindly run away in a direction that does not please God.  Blind thought are not biblically sound and can get us in trouble just as they did our famous fictional heroine.

Our children used to demonstrate wild imaginations when they were young and we were training them to work hard and obey us.  We’d tell the five of them to spend the afternoon raking up the back yard.  Their father would emphasize that the job had to be done before they could eat supper.  Bottom line:  they had to work together and finish the job in the time allotted.   As they grabbed the rakes and leaf bags the questions would begin.  “What if a tornado comes and blows us all away and we can’t finish?”  (No excuses.  You have to finish no matter what.) What if it gets dark before we’re done? (Work faster.)  What if a pack of wild dogs runs into the yard and messes up all our piles of leaves so we can’t get done on time? (Don’t let wild dogs into the yard.)  “What if I get so many blisters that my hands swell up and fall off…twice?” (Wear gloves.)

My Thoughts or God’s Thoughts?

I have to confess that at times my thoughts have also mounted the horse of ‘what ifs’ and galloped off into wild possibilities without first stopping to ask God  to direct me or give me wisdom.  Instead of praying we panic; instead of asking questions we assume the worst.

Don’t we do this sometimes when we have an illness?  We convince ourselves that we have a serious illness when we haven’t even been to the doctor yet to have things checked out. Our thoughts run away with us and a common cold becomes a fatal illness in our minds.

When we are separated from loved ones, either by distance or by death, we can fixate on what we have lost and ignore our daily duties.  We can long for things to be different, for our loved ones to be near us, so that we do not focus on reality.  We need to remind ourselves that we can grieve, but not as those who have no hope.

After our circumstances are altered – job change, move to a new town, a friend who turns her back on us, a long term illness – we can be tempted to relive the past , looking longingly back like Lot’s wife,  so that we miss today’s blessings.  By God’s grace we need to focus on all that we do have, not on the things which have been removed.

Take Every Thought Captive

2 Corinthians 10:5 reminds us we are to “take every thought captive to obey Christ.” We also train our minds to meditate on proper and godly thoughts (Philippians 4:8-9 ) “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.”

A good imagination under God’s control is a good thing, but blind thoughts can take us to a place where we do not honor the Lord. With God’s help we can set aside blind thoughts and allow the Holy Spirit to shape our thinking so that it glorifies God.